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(Back translation from Spanish)
As Latino parents, we work hard so that our children
make good decisions....
As parents, we struggle so that our children can have
a better future, a good education, a job, and, of course,
happiness. In this country, that future has been affected
by an alarming rage of teenage pregnancy. More than
3 out of every 5 Hispanic [young] girls become pregnant
before age 20. Truly, this is a delicate issue, but
who better than us, their first teachers, to guide them
through this important moment [time] in their lives?
They themselves say they prefer for their parents to
talk to them about this subject.
We hope the following tips help you guide your children
to good decision-making throughout their lives and,
also, to avoid teen pregnancy.
- Let's leave behind old-fashioned ideas that prevent
us from communicating honestly with our children:
let's talk to them openly - girls and boys - about
love, relationships, and sexuality.
If you think talking is not easy, you're not alone;
there are many parents in your same situation. If
your adolescent acts like a "know-it-all," don't get
discouraged. What happens is that it's just as difficult
for your teen to discuss this subject as it is for
you. The fact is that your kids want you to be the
person who talks to them. After all, parents are their
children's first teachers, and, therefore, children
trust their parents.
- Let's start talking about sexuality from an early
age, and often.
Children are curious about their physiques. If you
begin to explain to them step-by-step the changes
that take place in their bodies, then when the time
comes for a more detailed conversation, it will be
less uncomfortable for the both of you. You could
also talk about his/her feelings, since the child
is developing physically, emotionally, and socially:
he/she is getting to know his/her own self and [his/her]
role in the world [society]. Don't wait for your child
to grow up in order to have a one-time conversation.
Think that life is a school and that you, the parent,
are the best teacher.
- Let's supervise our kids' activities without
forgetting that they are no longer kids but rather,
young adults who need a certain amount of independence.
At this age, your kids go from being children to being
[young] adults. There will be times when they may
act childlike by sleeping with a favorite stuffed
toy or by collecting sports cards, and there will
be other times when your adolescent will rebel when
you begin to set limits [for going out] and curfews.
Keep in mind that this is their most social time;
therefore, acquaint yourself with their friends (remember
that theirs is a powerful influence.) If you approach
your son/daughter in a calm and fair manner, he/she
may understand that your sole interest is in protecting
him/her.
- As parents, we have the right to know with whom
our children go out.
When children enter adolescence, it's up to parents
to supervise their social lives. In doing so, we have
little choice but to set certain rules. We should
advise younger teens to go out with their friends
in a group. And when the time comes for dating, we
should recommend they do so with kids their own age.
We could explain, for example, that girls who date
much older boys expose themselves to even more pressure
and risk finding themselves in dangerous situations
like undesired sexual contact.
- It's good that we know what our children see,
read and hear.
Television, magazines, and radio may contain messages
that could confuse and even harm young people. Be
up-to-date on the information your son/daughter is
receiving, and take advantage of these moments to
clarify such messages. Sometimes a simple comment
can bring forth an important and productive conversation.
- We must help our teens set goals and explore
options for the future.
Ask your kids about their interests, what they want
to be, what they want to accomplish. Help them understand
the consequences that positive - or negative - things
can have on their future. Explain to them that, especially
in this country, an education or trade and some financial
independence are important if they want to reach their
goals. Also explain how an early pregnancy could have
negative consequences, because they would be responsible
for caring for and supporting the baby. If you help
your kids see the potential outcomes of their decisions,
it's more likely they will make good decisions now.
- Let's realize that a parent's job is never done.
No matter what age, in one way or another, children
will always need their parents. Cultivate a good relationship
with your kids by treating them with love, patience,
and respect throughout their lives. When parents and
their children get along, they share more than love;
they also share a good sense of communication.
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